Do you wish that you had more self-confidence?
For many of us, self-confidence doesn’t come naturally. It seems to be this asset that other people just seem to have, and it’s a mystery to us why they have it, and we don’t. Some people really do seem to have the ability to draw confidence out of nowhere, or from somewhere within themselves.
But what we can’t see is how many people are faking it.
The world insists that confidence is something that we must have, and that we will never survive without. In fact, the wolves of this world seem to prey on those who lack confidence. So, people fake it.
People try to create an illusion of confidence by presenting a confident image of themselves—in how they look, act, dress, or live. People can also present a confident image by the people and things they surround themselves with.
It may look good, but it’s all a facade. And it is exactly what the devil wants.
Satan wants your confidence to be placed in everything and anything but God. He especially wants your confidence placed in yourself.
It’s hard to imagine that the notion of self-confidence comes from the enemy, but think about it. Why would he want you to place 100% of your confidence in the One who is the source of all power, strength and wisdom—who is steady, unchanging, unfailing and ever-faithful to guide, uphold and correct you?
Satan doesn’t want you to have this confidence which you have access to—the only authentic confidence a Christian can have.
So he directs our source of confidence toward ourselves.
He hopes that if we walk in self-confidence consistently enough, for long enough, that we’ll develop that brash, self-exalted, spiritual swagger. It’s a self-centered walk, where one stops noticing others along the way—others who desperately need the Gospel we carry within. It’s also a forgetful walk—where one forgets about God’s grace, and how it allows us to stand.
Self-confidence is directly connected to the root sin of Pride—one of the deceiver’s favorite strongholds. The Bible says that Satan is not only a liar, but the “father of lies.” He knows that someone held by pride is almost certain to believe any lie he tells them.
And one of his favorite things to do, is to take someone who is on top of the world—and pull the rug out from under them. He watches and laughs as their world—and their self-confidence—comes crashing down.
It’s easy for him to do, if your confidence is in yourself, and in your own little kingdom.
Self-confidence is lost just as quickly as it is found. But you don’t need it.
As a born-again Christian, you can place all of your confidence in Christ, and His kingdom. Let’s look at just a few of the many reasons why you should, and must.
-You are crucified with Christ.
“I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.” (Galatians 2:20)
Your flesh—your humanity and it’s nature—are now nailed to the cross of Christ Jesus. Your personality, characteristics, traits, strengths and weaknesses—everything about you, good or bad—have been exchanged for the Life and person of Christ. He died for your sin—and supernaturally, you died right there with Him.
It is within the perfection of His holiness that your flesh dies—and your true life is by faith in Him, as He lives within you. Therefore, your confidence should be placed where your faith is: in Jesus Christ, who gladly exchanged Himself for you.
-You are one with Christ and the Father.
“And the glory which thou gavest me I have given them; that they may be one, even as we are one: I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me.” (John 17:22-23)
Through the infilling of the Holy Spirit, at the moment you believed, Christ now lives within you—and He lives within the Father. It is mystical and confusing for our natural, finite minds to accept within the confines of this physical world—but we are one with God.
The Almighty, All-Knowing, Eternally Existent Creator of the universe is one—with you! So why not choose to step aside, and allow Him to reign in every word, action and thought of your life? And learn to place all of your confidence in Him, as you do.
-You are seated with Christ in Heavenly Places.
“But God, who is rich in mercy, for his great love wherewith he loved us, Even when we were dead in sins, hath quickened us together with Christ, (by grace ye are saved;) And hath raised us up together, and made us sit together in heavenly places in Christ Jesus:” (Ephesians 2:4-6)
Anything you could even dream of accomplishing on this earth—any career, financial or social status you could achieve—pales to nothing in comparison to the rank, authority and rule you are given through Christ Jesus. It’s hard to imagine how we could be in two places at once—here on earth, and also in Heaven. But according to this verse, you are Christ’s “right hand man.”
Could you possibly dream of anything more important, more substantial and more privileged than serving alongside the King of the Universe? And can you think of anyone more worthy of your confidence, than the One who put you in this position?
-You are Christ’s friend.
“Henceforth I call you not servants; for the servant knoweth not what his lord doeth: but I have called you friends; for all things that I have heard of my Father I have made known unto you.” (John 15:15)
The Lord God calls you His friend. He values your friendship so much, that you are esteemed above even the angels—and His own natural family. And what a Friend He is—His loyalty goes beyond what any human being could do for another person. In fact, He cherished the thought of being your friend so much, that He died for you.
Think about it. You are best buds with the the Lord Jesus Christ! No level of popularity—no number of Facebook “likes” or “friends,” or any connections you have here on earth—comes even close to mattering.
Still wish that you could feel more confident?
Try talking to your Friend about it.
-You have the mind of Christ.
“For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he may instruct him? But we have the mind of Christ.” (1 Corinthians 2:16)
No longer do you have to depend on your own way of thinking—with all of its mistakes, dark thoughts, false starts, wrong beliefs, weak intentions and bad decisions. You have the mind of Christ—and you are able to tap into His brilliant, indescribable intelligence.
The brains of Elon Musk, Albert Einstein and Stephen Hawking don’t hold a candle to the brilliance of the Omniscient Creator—and you have His mind!
Of course, God still wants you to use the brain that He gave you—but don’t put your confidence in it. Put your confidence in the fact that the wisdom of the ages is available—with every humble request for help.
-You have God’s joy.
“If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father’s commandments, and abide in his love. These things have I spoken unto you, that my joy might remain in you, and that your joy might be full.” (John 15:10-11)
Jesus made it clear that our obedience to Him brings joy to our hearts—His Joy—constant and full. You have more than human, earthly happiness—you have the Joy of Christ. Even when you don’t feel it, His joy is accessible within you.
It is a mistake to seek happiness and confidence through the same outward efforts as the unbelieving world—a frantic pursuit of possessions, places and experiences. The world would have us believe that this is what all of the “happy” people are doing. But Christian, that is not your joy. There is no need for that—and there is no place for that in your life.
The truth is, your joy is just one act of obedience away. Do it. Your heart of obedience is your happy place, because that’s where Jesus lives. Go there. And the next time you feel down, place your confidence in His joy—the joy He died to give you.
-Your daily provisions are taken care of.
“But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:19)
The vast majority of us in the United States don’t know what it’s like to depend on God for day to day needs—and if we ever have, it’s been long forgotten. But there are many people around the world who have that dependence in the forefront of their minds, every single day.
We are missing out on a certain dimension of our relationship with God, when we don’t acknowledge Him as our provider for every daily need. Not only can we become less appreciative, but our confidence—which should be placed in our Provider—becomes placed on ourselves. We experience the burden and vulnerability of this misplaced confidence, especially when money gets tight.
God didn’t promise you a Lamborghini—but He did promise that your daily, earthly needs will be provided. It’s a good thing to be thankful for the basic things in life. By practicing gratitude and trust—acknowledging God as your Provider—your confidence is placed in Him, where it should be.
-You are bound for glory.
“In my Father’s house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.” (John 14:2)
Have you ever found yourself drooling over someone’s Instagram photos, wishing you had their life? I have. The tug of Instagram and other social media is powerful, because it’s kind of like peeping through a window. It’s an opportunity to look at someone else’s life. But if it’s a self-confident life, it is certainly an illusion.
My weakness always starts out as simple curiosity, and boredom. Click, click, click. After just a few minutes of clicking, I almost always end up coveting what they have. And if I stare too long, I lament over what I don’t have, or what I have lost. What a sinful, complete waste of time and heart it is!
Note to self, and also to you: We are Glory-bound! No matter what your life was here on earth—whether it was Instagram-worthy, or pretty lousy—Glory is where you will end up. Glory. You will live with Christ, in His abode, forever. Think about that.
Your life and your eternity with Christ is all that matters. It’s what He died for you to have.
There isn’t one good reason to hinge your confidence—or lack of it—on your earthly life, and your “lifestyle.” But the devil tempts you. He hopes you will forget about the Glory that awaits you. And he wants you to be unappreciative of your earthly life and blessings that you have right now.
Do what I finally did, and refuse to give place to the covetousness-inducing social media photos. Just get this mental picture: Jesus, preparing your place, right at this very moment. Your confidence can be found right there.
-Your physical body will be replaced.
“In a moment, in the twinkling of an eye, at the last trump: for the trumpet shall sound, and the dead shall be raised incorruptible, and we shall be changed.” (1 Corinthians 15:52)
Your physical appearance, strength, abilities or health may make you gain confidence, or lose confidence. But the day is coming when you will get rid of that used, rental body—however perfect or imperfect it may be. You’ll be trading it in for a brand new, glorified model—of incomparable beauty, and complete perfection—with the supernatural ability to defy physics, transcend space and time, and live forever.
It’s good to take care of yourself and to be healthy, and it’s nice to make your appearance the best it can be. But if your confidence is linked to how healthy, physically strong or attractive you are, it’s only a matter of time before something makes you feel bad about yourself—or makes you fear your fragility.
God sees you as the eternal being that you already are. See yourself that way too, and put your confidence in that.
-Your goodness only comes from Christ.
“For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not.”
“O wretched man that I am! who shall deliver me from the body of this death? I thank God through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 7:18, 24-25)
Remember that a spiritual transaction has taken place. Christ Jesus has paid the price for all of your sin—your mistakes, shortcomings, failures and weaknesses. There is no reason to condemn yourself when you fail—because once you confess, it’s all forgiven—covered by His own shed blood.
But there is also no reason to put confidence in yourself when you do well. Your ability to consistently “perform that which is good” is not of your own, but only found through the power of the Holy Spirit.
And your goodness only matters when it is for Him, by Him and through Him. All it takes is another failure for each and every one of us to be reminded that—apart from Christ—there “dwelleth no good thing” within us.
So whether you’re failing miserably, or doing good works—thank God, it’s not about you anymore. It’s about Jesus—so keep your confidence in Him.
-Almighty God is your Father.
“After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.” (Matthew 6:9)
You may have had a great dad or family, or they may have been the cause of much disappointment, shame or pain. Maybe you blame your dad or other family members for words or actions that broke your heart, shattered your dreams, stunted your growth, or squashed your confidence.
None of that matters now. Jesus made that clear as He began His prayer with, “Our Father.” Our Father. Your Father.
God—the One who dreamed of you, created you, and died for you—is your Father. And He’s the best Father that anyone could ever have.
He is always attentive, supportive, and encouraging. He is constantly there—leading and guiding you, cheering you on—compelling you to do your very best. He never fails to lovingly correct you, and gently lead you to realize whenever you’re wrong. He is always there to listen.
And, through Christ Jesus, your Father God is 100% confident in you. Think about that.
Your Heavenly Father is always limitless in His everything—for you. In return, always be limitless in your everything—for Him. This includes your confidence. Don’t hold back.
-You have authority over evil
“Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions, and over all the power of the enemy: and nothing shall by any means hurt you.” (Luke 10:19)
-and you dwell in safety.
“I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep: for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety.” (Psalm 4:8)
“But whoso hearkeneth unto me shall dwell safely, and shall be quiet from fear of evil.” (Proverbs 1:33)
You may live in relative safety, and enjoy a peaceful life—or you may live in a war zone. There is no need to have any fear over a perceived lack of safety or protection.
You have power over evil, that you exercise through the authority of the Lord Jesus Christ. There is no trained, armed soldier more threatening to the spiritual enemy than you. The weapons of your warfare supersede anything that you could have in the natural—they are mighty through God, and they pull down the very strongholds of evil.
You dwell in Christ. There is no home on the face of the earth—even on some private island or gated neighborhood—that would make you any safer than you are at this moment. And there is absolutely nothing that could happen to your physical body or life, which could take away your Lord and the life you hold within Him—both now, and forever.
But just as you need not fear evil, there likewise shouldn’t be any confidence placed in a perceived state of peace and safety. You still dwell in Christ, and your power is through Him—whether or not you happen to feel needy at the moment.
So, you have faith and trust—but practice placing your confidence in the fact that your safety and authority are in Christ. Every time you do, you are making a point of taking your confidence off of your circumstances. And when your circumstances change, and you feel threatened, your confidence will already be firmly in the One who has held you all along.
The One who gives you the power to overcome.
-Christ’s strength is made perfect in your weakness.
“And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me” (2 Corinthians 12:9)
You may be feeling strong and capable one day, or in one certain area of your life—and you may be tempted to stop praying, and stop acknowledging your dependence on God for your strength. After a while, this can become a practice—and before you know it, your confidence has now been placed in yourself, and your own strength.
And it’s only a matter of time before you fail at something, and your weakness is exposed to yourself—and possibly, to everyone around you, or even the whole world.
It doesn’t feel great whenever this happens, but it’s actually a wonderful opportunity. It’s a chance to re-place your confidence in the Person who is always strong for you—Christ Jesus.
It is in your weakness where His strength is not only present, but perfected. It’s a powerful realization of faith to trust in that process. And it’s a powerful act of trust to place your confidence squarely upon it.
-How to exercise Christ-confidence—a two step process
“Seeing then that we have a great high priest, that is passed into the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our profession. For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin.
Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:14-16)
- Hold fast your profession—firmly hold on to your faith—in Christ Jesus. Your Great High Priest, who understands everything that you feel, in every way.
- Come boldly to His throne. This is a boldness that takes humility—the humility to admit that you need God’s mercy, grace and help. But with your Savior on His throne—having shed his own blood for you—you can have the boldness to come before Him. It is there—His throne of Grace—where you will find what you need. His grace and mercy are what will always help you, whenever you need help.
By carrying out this two step process, you exercise Christ confidence—the only authentic confidence a Christian can have. It’s a combination of humility and dependence with unshakable security, formidable strength, and a true authority which can only come from Christ.
This confidence—Christ confidence—is unchanging, unfailing, and can never be taken away.
“I have set the LORD always before me: because he is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.” (Psalms 16:8)
The truth is that self-confidence is really just an illusion. It causes us to believe that we are capable of managing this earthly life—which we actually know very little about—on our own.
We may be able to convince the world for a while that we have it all together. But apart from the One who gives all good things to His Creation, we are fooling ourselves.
Remember the classic fairy tale about the emperor who had no clothes? He had convinced himself that he was looking good—and even had everyone around him telling him that. But the dude was actually naked.
“Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked and opened unto the eyes of him with whom we have to do.” (Hebrews 4:13)
People—we are completely naked before God! It’s one thing to fool others and appear confident, but we certainly can’t fool God.
So reject the enemy’s lies which lead you into deceiving yourself.
Completely reject the notion of self-confidence, and it’s weak, temporary stability.
Choose to assert your Christ-confidence, and you will be exercising the very same confidence that Jesus had in the Father, while He was here on earth.
And when you do, the enemy will tremble. Because He just can’t pull the Rock out from under you.